Post Easter Wilderness?

Wow.

I am feeling completely out of sorts. When I get quiet it’s just quiet. When I pray I’m just saying words. When I read it just ends when I stop. Life is really thin right now... and it is easy to slip in thought, word, and deed.

There are definitely highs and lows in this life.

This is a time when I ought to be elated. I should be “feeling” the mountaintop. I should be floating in the Sabbath of God. Holy Week and then Easter. Celebrating Palm Sunday, Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, Holy Saturday and then Easter. I just shriveled through the week. My head and heart are filled with cotton. It’s like I’m walking in a thick fog.

It’s so Strange.

Life goes on. I have a chapter to read, some writing to do, and I need to start working with my group as we begin to develop some theology on this question, “how can we help a middle school aged child who is being bullied know that God is present in his/her life.” Ought to be fun but it’s feeling strangely clinical and lifeless.

One bright spot maybe is that I’ve started thinking about my internship in a slightly different way. Maybe I’m getting some direction? I’m going to try to understand what’s going on in Owatonna (what’s the culture of this town? What are the obvious needs there? What are the not so obvious needs? How are the town politics? etc...). How is Saint Paul's responding to the needs there, how is Saint Paul’s coordinating with what is being done there, does Saint Paul's have a platform, a presence, and where does Saint Paul’s need to expend it's energy?

God help me.